Thursday, June 17, 2010

Sit Down and Shut Up!

Deb sometimes talks about this guy. He's the worst kind of guy. You know the type. He never has a good thing to say He's always finding the negative. He never builds anything up, but instead is constantly tearing you down.

And you want to know the very, very worst part about this guy? He's not really a guy. He's the voice in your head. He's the Inner Heckler. When you're writing a scene, the Inner Heckler whispers in your ear, saying things like, "That dialogue is awful," or "I can't believe you thought this plot development was a good idea. It's soooo lame," and, "Really? That's the best you can do?"

Most of the time, my Inner Heckler doesn't act up too much while I'm doing a rough draft. Usually, he bides his time, waiting until the rough draft is finished and he can be dismissive about my chances of ever getting it polished up to be good enough. See, my Heckler and I have a system.

For some reason, with this contest, he's breaking the deal. The past week or so, my Inner Heckler has gotten brave and he keeps hollering at me, which has put a big kink in my plan to write the most words. Dang Heckler, I bet Jenny's paying him off. I wouldn't put it past her to try bribing him to act up.

But, the good news is I've put in a call to Security and they're hauling him off, even as we speak. He's been disruptive and now I'm putting him in his place. It's a place with a sturdy lock and that funny-looking stuff they put on the walls of music studios to soundproof them.

Take that, Mr. Heckler.

1 comment:

Jenny Maloney said...

Actually, I think your heckler and my heckler got together and did lunch. I too have had to call security.